shout out your love! now, hero!

[bilocation]

[It wasn't entirely for his sake that she did it. After all, she did have an image to upkeep, and any unwanted attention was bound to hurt both of them. 'Dating.' Right. That's not what this is.

Whatever it is.

After shaking off the last of her friends, B-ko rounded the corner and snapped open her cellphone.]

I told you I'd do it. You owe me for this one.

[The sky was darkening. She made up some excuse to her parents that she'd be out late, studying. She didn't feel like going home quite yet. Not until she shook him down on this.]

Comments

[unconfirmed]

I don't flatter people.

[Unless he's mocking them or trying to lull them into a certain mindset before feeding them a rumour, of course, but that's entirely different. A-ya falls back into ]

If you want a full analysis, your hair has a pleasantly cool feeling to it. It has the same soothing feeling to the touch as silk would. Silk is overused as a description but you know why it's suiting? It's something naturally impressive because of its own qualities. I think that's why it's used so much. But in this case it fits.

Like your lips look attractive, similar to two cherry blossom petals, but they feel exactly like that. As the school beauty, it would be easy to write off your perfection as shallow but it's actually as it looks. Even your true face continues to be interesting and surprise me.

[bilocation]

[She shouldn't have pushed him for that. The more she hears him talk on and on as if it's normal and true, the tighter that strange feeling in her chest grows. So she goes back to what she understands best.]

... do you practice these in your head?

[unconfirmed]

Practice what? I do analysis all the time so it isn't hard to do it on the spot.

[bilocation]

Those lines. It's like you picked them out of a romance novel.

[unconfirmed]

[What.]

'Romance novel'? I've never read one. They're not lines, either. It's just an objective analysis.

[bilocation]

That was an objective analysis? The world must be scary through your eyes.

[unconfirmed]

[He pauses. Everything he sees is mundane and gray. Rainy and average. A bleak, gloomy place without any redeeming features.]

...Actually it's a pretty boring world.

[bilocation]

[... what a glum way to put it. But, when she thinks of it, isn't it similar to how she views the world? It's all a game for her, putting on the right masks to advance as far as she can, to please the right people.

When he admits something like that... and if he claims that all his compliments up until this point had just been objective analyses... then what does that make her in his boring world?

Ah. It's actually really flattering. To have her imperfect self be so highly valued.]

It's because you're a horrid pessimist. For a guy who doesn't think highly of the world, you sure know how to work it.

[unconfirmed]

[Well she's not wrong. He is a pessimist. But he still doesn't understand what she's saying.]

Putting it like that makes it sound intentional but it isn't.

[bilocation]

... if you thought those things about me, you should've said them earlier instead of making me run around like this.

[unconfirmed]

[Sorry, B-ko.]

Why? Run around like what?

[bilocation]

[She huffs and squeezes his hands with hers!!]

You're supposed to be the objective one, aren't you?! You're really nasty and upfront about everyone's business, so it should be the same for yourself as well!

[unconfirmed]

[He gets what she means this time. Apply his observations to himself. Self-analysis is hardly new to him but this just doesn't add him.]

In anyone else it would be obvious but in me, analysing feelings is a much harder process. Anyway, weren't you talking about yourself running around? I didn't cause you any stress.

[bilocation]

Then analyze it. [Even though she should've been the one to, too-- she's not the focus here, though. He is! She takes her hands away and presses them down in her lap, turning to face the abandoned train tracks.]

I can't believe you'd say that.

[unconfirmed]

[He doesn't want to. It's a very childish thing but while he feels comfortable with his self-reflection, wouldn't all this mean his interest in B-ko is actually that everyday feeling every teenager gets? That boring feeling that consumes all tv shows and books and even in urban legends, how many spurned lovers are they? Ghosts bent on revenge due to a soured love...

Love. Like. Those sorts of disgustingly average feelings, the daily desire to not be alone anymore, to be accepted.

A-ya sighs and slumps more against the bench, grateful he can look down instead of at her.]

...It's obvious at this point your crush is on me.

[Nailed it.]

[bilocation]

[That's a step towards what she wants to hear. Ah, she's really acting like the flustered teenage girl that she scorned her friends for. It's stupid, she told herself. Getting close to someone meant letting them make their mark on you. Small things, like sharing possessions or leaving scents.

She hated it. Because the perfect imposter was one that was untouchable. Having a mark on it meant it was reachable.

But she's not the imposter right now, is she? She's not B-ko. She's just herself.

And maybe, just maybe. She wanted to hear for once that someone wants that self to be around, in that honest and simple manner everyone complimented her mask with.

B-ko hunches her shoulders. She can't believe what she's about to say.]

... it's not a crush. [Her mouth feels dry. She shakes her head, and her voice becomes stronger.] It should be obvious to someone like you. It's not a crush if both of us share it.

[unconfirmed]

[She doesn't understand, does she? That feeling belongs to a world he wants no part of. Mundane things like that will just kill him. All the interest will be gone. If those feelings exist within him, he'll be forced into a routine world of normal happenings day in and day out.

But...

It's fine, maybe, if he puts it another way.]

...I like the days we spend together. Since meeting you, my life has been more interesting. When we meet up and talk, those times... if they continued everyday... I want that.

[bilocation]

[Truth be told, that's what she wants. A certain acknowledgement that the weak, vulnerable feelings she had at this moment wasn't just her. If A-ya shared it, then she wouldn't be the only one at risk of being hurt.

It's better together than alone.

And it's a affirmation that it's her that he's looking for, not her other self.

B-ko nods.]

See? It isn't that hard. [There's a pause before she reaches out to touch his hand again. Her hand was getting cold without it, anyway.] 'I didn't cause you any stress...' what a stupid statement. Don't say that to a girl who-- [Ah. It's okay to say it. Didn't they kiss?]

--who wants to keep you company.

[unconfirmed]

[Without much hesitation, A-ya shifts his hand to hold hers. It's so easy to do. It shouldn't be. This sort of thing should be beyond him, something he would never understand. Maybe... that's an immature way of thinking.

It's still how he thinks, though, and he isn't someone who deludes himself. These thoughts are so easy to read but messy when matched up to the strange feelings shoving them back. He wants to write them down and get them out or distract himself somehow.

Ah.

A-ya glances back up at her.]

...Would you keep me company now then?

[bilocation]

Don't ask stupid questions. [She doesn't pull her hand away, though. Carefully, she shifts her fingers until she's laced them with his. His grip feels a little bony. Despite that, the blush has returned to her face. She must be losing it if she's letting herself be so easily impressed...]

I already said I wanted to spend time with you.

[unconfirmed]

[Does he kiss her now then? Is that what people do in this situation? Now that he thinks about it, he isn't sure what his question just confirmed aside from spending time together. Well, he can work that out later.

A beat. Asking a stupid question would annoy her, right? So do that.]

Should I kiss you now?

[bilocation]

[A-ya really can't read the mood, can he. She scoffs.]

Are you going to ask that every time we hold hands? You can't be that dumb. Look-- [Ignoring her fast-beating heart, she leans in to peck him on the mouth. She keeps her face close, though.] There. You don't have to ask. Just... do it, got it?

[unconfirmed]

[This time he looks amused.] That expression really suits you.

[bilocation]

[Ah--]

Wh-What expression?

[unconfirmed]

That irritated, flustered expression. It gives your cheeks a specific rosy shade and your voice isn't controlled anymore.